Welcome to Winchester

I don't think these guys are taking themselves too seriously but it gives a little window into life out here. Winchester is a relatively big city compared to Monteagle about 20 miles north on 24.

Church...

Yesterday, we went to Pat & Audra's church in West Chester. Crestview Presbyterian was a neat experience. Even though the church isn't Catholic they are observing a modified kind of Lent. The whole point is to sacrifice in the 40 days leading up to Easter and remember what Jesus Christ did for us.


I had the privilege/horror/opportunity to witness this statue lit up at night at Solid Rock Baptist in Monroe, OH. 65 feet tall!!

Cleaning up the weekend in Cincinnati

* My roommate from coaching soccer at the Santa Clara University camps is blogging his SECOND tour in Iraq. He was called up from the reserves and is back overseas. He's sarcastically hilarious but could use the encouragement of knowing people here care about what's going on there.
His blog is aptly titled "never as funny the second time..."

* Verizon didn't work in the whole state of Kentucky. A quarter mile after we saw the sign that said "Welcome to Tennessee" I was once again connected with the rest of the world. Kelly couldn't believe how much this upset me.

* Snow is fun - especially in flip-flops... no one warned me that the greater Cincinnati/Dayton area was going to have a slush/snow/rain/sleet storm on Saturday.


* The Hofbrauhaus is technically in Kentucky - just on the other side of the river - which means you can still smoke indoors which is brutal for any Californian that appreciates clean air...


Kelly & Audra: 10:30PM


Kelly & Audra: 2AM


You won't see him working at the Hofbrauhaus in Munich...


* Bojangles in West Carrolton, OH just outside Dayton. The band played hard rock covers and originals that were really not that bad. At one point the techie was working on the drum kit when the lead singer took this real big step backwards in a complete rock star maneuver and almost bailed. I enjoyed that but not as much as the quality on the dance floor.

The night was saved when I almost traded my Guayabera for a denim shirt with a wolf silkscreened on the back. I had to *settle* for his faded blue t-shirt with Foghorn Leghorn on the front with the caption "Chicks Dig Me". Yes people, this is Dayton.

Bullfighting is like smoking…

…Why would anyone still do it?

I watched an actual bullfight in its entirety at lunch in the restaurant in Santa Ana, Sonora. I understand there are art forms that I might not enjoy (ballroom dancing, ice skating, synchronized swimming) but this one is kind of beyond me. I had seen where they stick pins behind the head of the bull but that is such a minute part of it all.

The matador has a sword that’s maybe two and a half feet long. After he has teased the bull (for quite a while) with his cape and it’s starting to get tired he gets his big moment. As the bull charges he plants this sword through the back of the neck at a 45 degree angle through the body. Then these clowns come out and keep the bull running back and forth until it finally gives in and lays down to die. The sword is pulled back out and the matador proudly walks around the arena with his bloody prize.

I’m not about to join PETA or anything and I don’t want to deny anyone their heritage & culture but this just doesn’t seem necessary…

Customer Question for Food Manufacturer

An unnamed friend (Audra's sister-in-law) works at a major food manufacturer and comes across the questions and complaints that people have about their various products. Today's winner is...

"I try and have a fruit smoothie every day because it is good for you. I usually put Vodka in my Fruit Smoothies. Does alcohol kill the live cultures? I only drink part of it one day and have the rest the next day. How long can they stay mixed with alcohol without killing the live cultures? I put 5 or 6 shots of vodka in with 2/3 cup of yogurt with some milk and oatmeal and flax seed."

The Tennessee DMV...

I'm going to try and keep this as simple as possible...

Here's the California scenario... your vehicle registration comes from the DMV and it's usually a few hundred dollars. If you delay paying it gives you elevated prices as a penalty and then no matter when you actually register, it is retroactive to the day the registration was due. Going further, if you get a fix-it ticket or some kind of correctable violation you have to get it signed and I think my last one was around $15.

Well, in Tennessee they operate a little differently. My uncle and I share this purple '93 Ford Ranger with a cracked windshield and hanging side view mirror. Over the weekend, he got pulled over by the State Trooper with one of those flat-brimmed Canadian Mounty hats because the stickers were out of date on the plate.

The truck is in the name of a missionary here who is rarely around and hadn't been able to get to it since it just came due in JULY! So, we go down to the courthouse in Altamont which houses every imaginable government office. Now, to register the vehicle it would have been only $24 (I'm becoming increasingly bitter about the $160 "congestion charging zone" ticket that Johnny and I got during our first day in London). The lady tells us that it's only $21 for a new tag (their term for a license plate) and that we can do that instead. Ok, sure... so we get the paperwork back and it is now registered for another full year.

We then head upstairs to show proof of vehicle registration to take care of my uncle's ticket. The lady copies the registration and hands it back to me and we're done. I was seriously confused. How much is this going to cost? Do we pay later? Nope... all done. This can't be right!!

The lesson that the state of Tennessee just taught me was DO NOT REGISTER your vehicle until forced to do so by the law because all the time that you drive without it being registered is FREE and when you do get caught there's no punishment except to visit Altamont and make a photo diary out of it.

Tennessee - Weekend recap from Nashville

(click on pics to enlarge) The night began at Flying Saucer which has a club. $14 membership, drink all 200 beers on tap and get a personalized plate on the wall. We spent our time trying to figure out what we would put on our plate.







Tootsie's is famous for... awful bands! This redneck version of Nickelcreed Doors Down murdered every cover they played including one of my favorite Skynrd songs. Sadly, playing the guitar behind his head didn't make him sound any better.







Our final stop of the night was The Stage. I didn't get a picture of the dude with the cowboy hat made out of Coors Light cases. We spent more time watching him float through the crowd than paying attention to the music. One of their jewels was "Play that Country Music, White Boy"...




Yep, the music was not my fave but the Flying Saucer was solid and Kelly's friends are quality, Oh-tay!

Editorial in the Grundy County Herald

TO THE EDITOR:

My son Brent is buried at Burkett’s Chapel Cemetery between here and Gruetli-Laager; as the crow flies. Yesterday was his birthday, and his sister, mother, and I went to visit him for the occasion. We found that his grave had been vandalized, and a concrete deer has been dug up and stolen.
I would like to tell you about this deer. The deer was bought by Brent’s grandmother to put beside his grave. Brent loved the woods and nature in general. When I placed the deer by his grave, the deer became his and was then possessed by his spirit. Brent has a host of relatives buried around him, and they all saw you dig his deer up and steal it.
His great-grandfather is buried closes to Brent and he watches over his great-grandson because he and Brent have a special connection. He was called “Ringeye” by most of his friends, and died in 1945.
You that took that deer took a possessed deer from a dead man’s grave, and that is bad. Let me tell you why. You will not have any peace because Ringeye, Brent, and maybe the host of relatives will haunt you until you return his deer to the gravesite or to me.
If you have recently bought a concrete deer that is brown in color standing on a green platform, you have bought a possessed deer. If you destroy the deer or get rid of it, things will not be any better for you. You will hear “Ringeye, Ringeye, Ringeye,” as you try to sleep.
Brent spoke with a seep southern drawl, and you will also hear his laugh, “heh, heh, heh.” There is not(sic) telling what you will see. And if you place this deer in your yard, you will also place Ringeye, Bent(sic), and a host of relatives there. This will continue for you and the one who actually stole it until the deer is back at his gravesite or you can bring it to me. And I will tell them to go on back and leave you alone.
Now I am serious, so don’t try to laugh it off. You will see. I hope you do not tolerate the wrath of stealing form the dead long, because it is a serious matter. You can get away with doing things to live people, but not the dead. They have nothing else to do but torment you, and this will happen until your actions are reversed.
Please do not wait long, because the longer you hesitate, the worse it gets. If you have any information about this deer, call me at 877-243-2823 or 931-592-6673. Dial the toll-free number first, then enter my number. Thank you and God bless you.

Roger Shrum
Tracy City, TN

How can we kill Popular Politics?

I'm not sure if "Popular Politics" is a term or anyone else would recognize the distinction I want to make but here goes...

I recently picked up one of Michael Moore's books to try and get a liberal perspective on current events and American culture. It was a total waste of time and not because he's on the left. He is the liberal Ann Coulter. For every exaggeration and tongue-in-cheek comment she has made about converting Muslims, he has his own generalization that is just as worthless. Maybe I'm the last one to become completely disenchanted with political discourse as it stands but count me as tired. I studied business so it's sad that I need to be reminded that it's all about the $$. From Air America to Rush Limbaugh to Fox News Channel to CNN it's just making the loudest screamers rich. It has nothing to do with working together to improve America because that is boring. There is no intelligent exchange of ideas.

Seriously, where can you turn to educate yourself on the issues to a degree that goes deeper than a 15 second sound bite? Thomas Sowell is someone worth reading. I'm currently working on Black Rednecks and White Liberals which proposes some really controversial ideas. Since he has facts to support his theories it takes too much time to present to the general public and therefore we're stuck arguing about whether Bush should have a presidential library at SMU or if Gavin Newsom should resign as mayor of San Francisco. Even though I think John Edwards' plan for universal health care is fatally flawed at least he is putting something substantial out there - wait, he's early campaigning for the presidency...

What can we do?

Oh, and Gavin Newsom having an affair with his aide's wife does matter... not because he sleeps around but simply because he's untrustworthy and will do what he pleases if it suits him.

St. Stephen's Green

I'm not comparing myself to Jesus but please remember that he hung out with lepers and hookers and the Pharisees hated him. I think it's too bad that having a couple drinks at the pub would mark me out as something less than an active and striving believer. It kind of goes to show how our culture decides to view people. It's always from such a distance and fails to get to the core of the person which matters. The content of our conversation didn't become relevant until much later. I suppose that this was ALWAYS one of the biggest issues I had with my dad in my teen years. He would look at me and get upset because I "look like every other punk out there". OK, but I'm not and I know that a lot of people act how they look but I would rather give them the benefit of the doubt. If a Christian's duty on earth is ministry, how are you going to do that when you've already dismissed the tattooed, the piereced, the spiky hair, the tattered clothing. You know, non-believers judge Christians by lame and unrealistic criteria as well but maybe that's because they feel the wrath of the Christian first. My cousin was telling me that at a church out here in Tennessee some teenagers were turned away from church because the dude had an earring and the girl was wearing pants. It doesn't sound like that is an isolated occurrence either. I know the topic of judgmentalism has been discussed to death and we're all so enlightened now. Don't I wish... How cherry would it be to be able to be blind to people's appearances? I'm getting loopy now but what if everyone appeared so bright or dark that you couldn't make out features or what they were wearing or even how big they were. All you had to go on was their words and their actions. Wouldn't that change the world?! Anyway, I won't let my conscience be bothered by hanging out in a pub and having a conversation with depth...